Monthly Archives: November 2016

moving forward

moving forward

Shit.

 

I mean, really.  That our country selected Donald Trump over, well, over anyone else is just shit.

And I’ve been afflicted with the white upper middle class guilt trauma of it all – weeping, lethargy, sadness.  When my Kai looked up at me and said, “but, Mommy, what if Donald Trump doesn’t do his best?” and I assured him that of course he would, he’s our new President, and in my heart I wasn’t sure what that even looked like – he’d do his best to fulfill his horrific campaign promises?  He’d do his best to change his mind, alienating his voters, and sparking yet more class and regional division in our country?  Is there anything we can hope for here? – I just gave up for a little while.

Then we got a stomach bug.  “We” meaning Andrew and myself, and the ripple affects of that were being behind on all work – household, office, church, self-care, you know, our children.

Shit.

But here we are in a new week, and I’m currently focusing on three things.

  1. I’m a gosh-darn HSP, and so yeah, the back-to-back Holy Land trip and then Tump-pocalyse was going to kick my ass.  Too.  Much.  Feels.  My needing some buffer days of non-functioning wasn’t me being lazy or lame, it’s just how I roll.  And now I’m able to do my thing again.
  2. I am a sooooo privilaged.  Other than repealing the autism-specific help of the ACA, or shifting the focus of autism research back to the stone age of vaccine-conspiracies (both things Trump has said he’d do), I’m bullet-proof.  I have healthcare independant of the ACA.  I’m done having babies, and I have an IUD good through the whole Trump presidency.  I’m in a heterosexual marraige, I’m white, I’m Christian, I’m employed…I’m personally going to be fine.  SO – I can help others.  I can speak.  I can swing my white-lady opinions around and around.  And I will.
  3. But.  I am, above all, pro-Peace.  A follower of Jesus.  I will never forget that every human being I encounter is created in God’s image, and that the most important commandment, second only to loving God, is to love your neighbor as yourself…and everyone I meet is my neighbor.

That’s enough to work on for now, I think.

Transition

Transition

People have been asking me how the transition from Holy Land to Home, from Pilgrimage to Day-to-day is going.

It’s complicated. Part jet lag, part inevitable fatigue, part wild juxtaposition.

In concrete terms, I’m falling asleep easily and sleeping deeply, and am ferociously protecting any quiet time I’ve built into my day. My brain is refusing to multi-task – I just had to turn off the radio to write this post. I can take a breath and envision the Judean Desert, dropping into its stark emptiness and on the other side of that coin having too many roles to play at church this Sunday seems untenable rather than simply quirky. Our election drama seems make believe and fabricated and separate from real life.

I’m very glad to be back. I’m getting reacquainted with things.

Pray for Peace.14725652_10209390932643145_3303267882139300761_n