So, I was supposed to go to a cookie swap last night, hosted by my mom’s group. I had the 6 dozen cookies. I had the cheese ball, the rosemary crackers, the assorted cheeses and pepperoni tray (we were supposed to bring an appetizer to share). I had holiday earrings on.
What I didn’t have was a babysitter. Andrew had to work late (he’s been working so hard lately) and by the time he got home, the party was in full swing, cookies already swapped. If I had arrived late, me and my 6 dozen cherry-chocolate-almond oatmeal cookies, it would have been awkward – people dissembling their cookie varieties to try to make room for mine and to give me scraps from their plates.
And there’s the other thing. That thing that happens every time I’m about to leave my house, where if a hurricane or blizzard suddenly appeared and I could not leave my house, I would be secretly so grateful. I don’t know if this is HSP (anticiating all the social cues? Worried about being on time?) or just an Erika-quirk. I am not allowed to cancel plans the day of, because if I could, I always would. Movies, parties, classes, work – I’d cancel every time.
So, I was disappointed, sure. I would have gone to this party if I could. I would have had an amazing time. But in that moment when I realized timing was not going to work, I was secretly so grateful.
Instead, I finished our holiday cards. Andrew came home, and I had the crackers, cheese, and pepperoni out. He made us drinks. We sat by the Tree and watched a terrible-but-I-enjoy-it-every-year holiday movie called “The 12 Dates of Christmas” and addressed all those cards and it was actually a really nice evening.
Plan B was pretty good, actually. Having those cards done (I’m going to post holiday cards for the first time since 2012 or 2013, I can’t remember) feels good. Spending time with Andrew feels good. Sitting by a tree with yummier yummies than usually in the house watching a bad movie feels good.
I keep reminding myself that eating all 6 dozen cherry-chocolate-almond oatmeal cookies would not feel good. Wish me luck.