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Milestone Mulling

Milestone Mulling

Milestones often kick off a time of contemplation for me.  It’s like I’m just walking down a path – la di da di da – and suddenly I look up!  And I see how far I’ve come!  And I see my surroundings aren’t the same as when I started!

So I stop.  And take stock.  And think.  And eventually start walking again.  The time I spent around our 10th wedding anniversary (10 years!  It stopped me cold.) ended up being a hard period – but the work I did, the therapy I accepted, the communication built between Andrew and me, I feel is so for the good now.

This past week had a series of milestones all in a row, which means I’m feeling extra-contemplative:

– my brother and his wife had their first son, Charlie, who is named after my grandfather who passed away this past Christmas.

– Andrew turned 40.  40!

– I found a grey hair in my eyebrow (I know, what?) and had what I’m pretty certain was my first hot flash this morning.  This plus a couple of other symptoms leads me to think my body is saying “Welcome to the early days of perimenopause, Erika.  How ya doin’?”  (Answer – a little WTF about the whole thing, but in general just fine. Yes, going to doctor just in case it’s something else.)

All of these things are good things, or rather, to be expected things, normal things, things on the path…but I’m standing still and mulling right now.  Gonna swim down into the depths for a little bit, and am interested to see what I bring back to the surface with me.

On Trend

On Trend

I am wearing these shoes today.

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I got them from StitchFix, which yes, I still subscribe to.  Every 3 months they send me a box, and I try everything on. I usually love everything and have to carefully select what I want from many positive options, since my clothes-money envelope isn’t the best funded envelope in our cash envelope system.

Occasionally, I don’t like the box so much, but since I’ve already paid the $20 styling fee, I pick out one item to keep and use.  I tell myself I’ll wear it for a month and see how it goes, and donate it to Goodwill if it just doesn’t click.  Playing with clothes, with fashion, is fun for me.

These shoes were my “if you say so” purchase from 2 shipments ago.  I have never owned or worn shoes like these before.  And yet, every time I wear them, women, usually young women, early-20s women with confidence and sense of style, these women go out of their way to walk up to me and say, “Your shoes.  I love them.”

And I look at them, these black wedge booties with the weird rope detail, and I think, “really?”

Yet, I’ve kept them.

I wear them.

I’m “On Trend”.

I’m sort of a different person when I wear them – a person who tries new things, a person who is taller with longer legs, a person who smiles and takes compliments in stride.  For now, this is still fun and worth the money.

Someone give me a heads up when these on-trend shoes become out of style, though, okay?  Because I don’t get them in the first place.

Productive Procrastination

Productive Procrastination

I’m doing the productive procrastination thing, when you put off doing the stuff you ought to be doing right now (Christmas is eleven days away, you say?  I’m sure those presents will shop for and wrap themselves.  And those cookies are *self-baking* cookies.  I should finish decorating?  Hmmm…I have until Jan 6th technically, right?) and instead do something totally useful and good and checklist-y – just not really the priority for this day, this moment.

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So I’m daydreaming about 2017.  I’ve reconfigured my work schedules between Jazzercise and the church to give me another “work from home” day.  I’m contemplating my bullet journal spread, and how I want to track things.  I’m thinking about resolutions.  (Be On Time: if you’re late, it shall not be because of you – current leader.).  I think it’s time for another 30-bags-in-30-days decluttering challenge.  Kai will be moving to a new bed for his birthday, and we need to find a twin mattress.

See, I’m working!  I’m getting stuff done, planned, organized!

Just not, you know, Christmas stuff.